"Life for me ain't been no crystal stair"

That one line has always stuck in my head. It comes from a poem "Mother to Son" by Langston Hughes. Look it up if you have never read it.

From my interpretation of the poem, it's about a mother sharing her life experiences with her son. She is telling him that life hasn't always been easy but that hasn't stopped her from climbing. She tells him to never give up because life only gets harder once you stop trying.

For some reason, though, when this line pops into my head a different thought comes to mind. It always reminds me to never judge a person before you really know their story. Sometimes we look at a person and think to ourselves about the amazing life that the person has. A perfect family; a perfect job; a perfect image.

Even though it may seem that way, we never really know what is going on mentally or physically with that person. We never know what they may have been through before to obtain this "perfect" family, job or image. For some, this could be marriage number 3. After working for 16 years, the person may have finally found the perfect match in their career. As far as image, it's not necessarily about looks, more about confidence. The right amount of confidence gives off a great image to people. It's inviting. It makes that person beautiful. So we may not know that that person has previous years of body issues and finally found the help to overcome those issues.

Take the time out to speak to someone that you may think has that "perfect" thing that you want. You may just  be surprised as what you find out.

What do you think about "Mother to Son" bu Hughes? Do you have a different interpretation? Have you recently had the chance to ask someone how they achieved that "perfect" thing and you were surprised at their answer?

Dating and the mortgage

Two years ago, I had the opportunity to be an intern in Washington D.C. It was by far one of the greatest experiences of my life. I made AWESOME friends, had some GREAT night and had some AMAZING dates. *Let me enjoy this flashback*

While I was there interning and making my rounds in the D.C. area, I realized that every decision we make in life somehow affects our ability to pay mortgage/rent on the first. Perhaps this is something you already knew, but it was a new revelation for me. Even though it's something we often think about, it's important to realize how relationships can hinder you paying the mortgage. Think about it.

Deciding who to date is important. This part of our personal life can affect our work life in positive or negative ways. A good relationship can give you that extra boost of confidence that you need at work, allowing you to excel and achieve short-term and long-term goals. A bad relationship can be strenuous. You eventually take your problems with you to work, causing you to lose focus on work assignments. Either way, your relationship can affect your ability to maintain your job.

Besides that, you have to ask yourself if the person you are dating has the potential to help you pay a mortgage or can pay your mortgage if you cannot.More importantly, is this the person you want to share this responsibility with? It sounds simple, but it's very important.

This isn't one of those materialistic thoughts about wondering if a person can your bills, it is more so about evaluating the people that we decide to date and how much time we give them in our life. It's nice to date someone because they make you happy, but statistics show that one of the major reasons for divorce is because of finances. Please don't ask for me to show you the stats. Google it - it's true! We have to ask ourselves what it is this person is going to be able to bring to the table in the long run. If they don't have it now, do they at least possess the potential? Sometimes we have a diamond in the rough that just needs some work.

After a "break up" that I recently had, I realized, again, how important this is. Am I over thinking it? How do you feel about it?

...and then there was a blog

What do I say? Is anyone reading this? What do you think? Should I tell you about myself? What do I do? I'm just going to shoot for it and give it all I have!

I am not sure what has taken me so long to start this blog. Initially I was just lazy and then I realized I didn't know what the heck I was supposed to write about. After putting it off for so long I figured I should just start the process and see where it goes. So, thank you for joining me in this process as I learn to craft my writing skills and lure you into being obsessed with my striking looks, dazzling smile and amazing charm. Please be aware that my favorite subject is ME, but I will save all those wonderful details for later.

Everyday I realize how lucky I am. I have had the opportunity to meet some amazing people who have became great friends in life. Sometimes we never realize the blessings that we have in our life until we need them.

One of my FAVORITE entertainers (Notice I didn't say singers) of all time is Patti Labelle, affectionately known as Mama Patti. One of my favorite songs of hers is "You are my friend." I think it expresses how great relationships are and what they really mean in life, whether it's a relationship with a friend or a significant other.

Patti Labelle "You Are My Friend"

I don't yet know who I am going to marry in life but I do know that this song will be played at some point throughout this celebration. Take a look at this performance from Mama Patti and let me know what you think about the clip, as well as who are the great people in your life.

Thanks for stopping by! Make sure you are following me on Twitter @jrholston.

*Please note that I do not own any rights to this song or clip*